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Are You Dating Older Because You Really Want To or Is There Something More Going On?

Reasons for dating older men

When you started dating there was something on the inside of you that desired attention, affection, companionship, and an insatiable need to love, simply love another human being! But relationship can become complicated and what you thought you found in someone really isn't what you thought. You had hoped that they would fulfill your needs and they didn't. You thought that they were lovable, but you soon discover that they are incapable of loving you back because of one issue or another. This type of situation doesn't only happen to partners close in age, but to those who are years even decades apart. What makes these relationships sometimes a little more challenging is when a young partner suddenly wakes up to the harsh reality that they were persuaded to stay in a relationship that really wasn't meant to be by a skillful mature person who knows how to say and do all the right things to keep you holding on.

Before one steps out in the world of dating older, he or she must know for certain that is what he or she wants. Are you dating because you are curious? Have you had no success dating others your own age? Are people around you encouraging you to do so? If you are being motivated because of others, then you might want to re-evaluate dating older, you have to be the one to want to do it, not because someone has told you, "I think you should…" Strange things happen, people get hurt, and worse find themselves in early graves listening to others. What does your gut or inner oracle thing?

Dating older is a good thing when you have tried everything else, so to speak. You will find yourself learning about people, places, and things that you never knew. Maturity, security, and other things that older individuals provide can be a fresh of breath air. However, not all are responsible, kind, and generous about personal lives, wealth and more. Rather, there are far too many people who have already married, divorced, married again, and divorced that aren't interested in making any serious commitments to younger dates. So if you are doubtful about what exactly you want from a date and are unable to really devote the time getting to know an older date, then you have to ask yourself, "Now why am I dating in the first place? And why someone older?"

Life goes by very quickly. People remember when they were in their twenties thinking they had plenty of time to make this decision and that one. They go to school, work and play, and in between it all may desire someone who wants more out of life besides the usual fun times. But an older person who has already done much with his or her life, isn't looking to get revved up, he or she is looking to settle down and an older person who spent years not having any fun in life, just might be looking for someone to ignite his or her passion for life again. When you know the type of person you might be interested in, it will be easy to determine whether you have a potential date that is your match.

Sometimes young people date for hidden and not-so hidden reasons. The agenda might get a little complicated when seeking to date older people, because unfortunately many have baggage. They may have an ex, children, money woes, and other issues that might affect them from making a great connection with their dates. Meanwhile, the young dater with a strategy is blocking any potential love to permeate one's mind and heart, because the agenda is more important than the connection. Maybe dating really isn't what either wants, could it be the pair just needs a friend?
Whatever that "something" is for dating someone older, be sure that it isn't the kind of thing that is destructive, hurtful, heartless, or selfish. Yet, if you find yourself hiding what is really going on with you, then face it, your dates just aren't going to go well. You won't attract the kind of person that you truly desire. You just might find someone who has reasons for dating you that aren't necessarily healthy.

There are those who are older who seek young people to date because they see a fountain of youth, a temporary escape from a mundane lifestyle, then there are others who date because they wholeheartedly desire to make a serious connection. Like there are older individuals who might date for all the wrong reasons, so are there younger people. You must remember to check yourself, find out whether your reasons for dating someone older are for good reasons. Are you sincerely being honest and true? Do you really want to be with someone older for possibly the rest of your life?

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